Well, I guess it is time to talk about my weight journey. It is definitely part of my Crazy.
My Weight Story
I was thin all through school and college (but, of course, totally didn’t know it and thought I was heavy). I gained about 15 pounds during college but was at a healthy weight at graduation. I gained about 65 pounds over the next 8 years. I can’t say that something happened to trigger it or that I really have an excuse. I think I may have been too happy and too comfortable and just stopped caring about what I looked like? I am incredibly picky (my eating habits and tastes are similar to a 2 year old), but I really like what I really like, which is mostly junk. [It’s a good thing I was never interested in alcohol, cigarettes, or smoking, because I have an addictive personality. I do think I am addicted to Diet Coke and sugar. Anyway, back to my story.] I joined Weight Watchers (the first time) around 2001. I was successful and lost over 40 pounds that first year. I was at an okay weight, not skinny but not overweight either, probably a size 8. I got comfortable and about half the weight crept back up before I got pregnant with my first child. I decided pregnancy meant I could eat anything I wanted so while I increased my healthy foods and ate more fruits and vegetables, I also increased my milkshake and sweets intake (nothing tasted better to me than a milkshake and fries during that pregnancy). I gained over 50 pounds and was at my heaviest weight ever after my first daughter was born. I dabbled with Weight Watchers online and did a few things here and there and managed to lose 35 pounds before getting pregnant a second time about 16 months later. I was more careful this time around and gained exactly 35 pounds during this pregnancy (I didn’t gain much weight until the last month or so and then just couldn’t control it anymore). I was back at my heaviest weight when my second daughter was born. I lost about 25 pounds over the next 4 years through Weight Watchers online and a few other diets. I officially re-joined Weight Watchers in August 2012 and started attending the meetings again. I lost 30 pounds in the first 9 months! And then I got comfortable with it AGAIN and have been screwing around since May 2013! It is SO frustrating! What is it with self sabotage??? I skipped some weeks, even months, and stopped counting points and just ate whatever I wanted. I am up 12 pounds of the 30, which brings me back to where I was in 2001 when I first started. If you are keeping track, that would be a full circle completed over a 14 year span.
Isn’t that stupid??? Every night I convince myself that I am in it for real from now on and tomorrow is a new day and that I can totally do it but everyday one thing leads to another (Hi, I don’t have my sh*t together) and I forget to eat breakfast, grab a Starbucks on the way to work because I am late, don’t have time to pack a healthy lunch, make poor choices at work, eat at my desk, then run around all afternoon snacking on random things and throwing some half-ass dinner together (or eating out AGAIN) which results in weight gain. Motherhood has provided me with SO many excuses too! I am too busy to eat healthy. I am too busy to take care of myself. I take care of the kids, they eat healthy, but I don’t take care of myself. Aren’t I supposed to put the gas mask on me first before assisting a child in an emergency on an airplane? Why do I put everyone else first? Why am I the last on my To Do list? *SIGH* I digress….
Getting Back on Track
BUT I am slowly getting myself back on track. I am not getting any younger, and I am starting to see what my life could be like in another 25-30 years if I don’t start taking care of myself now. I am still going to my Weight Watcher meetings and I weigh in every week. I started tracking my points NO MATTER WHAT the past 3 weeks and it definitely is telling me what I am doing wrong (I don’t mean to get all scientific here, but I think I might eat too much and not exercise enough… WEIRD!!!). I have been counting steps for a few weeks now as well and always aim for at least 10,000 per day (I average at about 6,000 right now but that is way better than my 3,000 when I first started tracking!). My next step is to just do it. Stop fooling around and just do it. It is JUST food. This time around I have a friend going to the meetings with me, a text support group, and my blog to keep me going!
A friend of mine sent me this really good article on weight loss from Vital. I just love the graphic with the tangled arrow. I am so in the middle of that tangled arrow but it is NOT the end of my journey. And while I have learned the language, I definitely am not fluent in it yet. But I can totally do this. GET YOUR SH*T TOGETHER, DEBBIE!!!
Can you relate? Do you know what I mean? I know I am not alone here! This is a common story among a lot of women and especially moms. I would love to hear your story!
Tips and inspiration can be found on my Healthy Me Pinterest board:
Follow Is My Crazy Showing?’s board Healthy Me on Pinterest.
Related Topic – Going Glutton Free